This was my first ever MMF book. If you don’t know what that means, it stands for: male/male/female. This is a polygamist relationship book. I wasn’t sure how I would feel about it, but I read some really great reviews and wanted to give it a shot. I’ve got to be honest, I’m still not really sure what I’m feeling. I cried a lot, especially at the end when our trio finally gets their HEA. I think my heart is confused because it’s so different than what I’m used to. It feels like it should be wrong, but it’s not. Not at all. This book made me definitely want to read more MM and FF books, I think I’d even be open to exploring more MMF or MFF (if there are any books written). So this review might feel a little off compared to my previous reviews, but bare with me as I navigate my emotions.

Ben and Jess are a married couple in their thirties with a nineteen year old daughter, Hailey. Hailey brings home her boyfriend, Ryan, for Thanksgiving and that’s where our story truly begins. Ryan is immediately attracted to Ben. He’s never really had same sex urges before, but there’s something about Ben that pulls me in. After a night in the basement together, Ben and Ryan begin an affair. Hailey and Jess are none the wiser. After Thanksgiving break ends, Hailey and Ryan go back to school and things go back to normal. Except…they really don’t. Ryan and Hailey break up, it’s amicable. Ben can’t stop thinking about Ryan, and Ryan can’t stop thinking about Ben. Ben goes to visit Ryan and that’s when Jess uncovers their secret. At first, she’s really hurt. She feels betrayed and cheated on. She’s confused about Ben’s sexuality (just as much as he is) and they fight. But pretty soon, Jess realizes that she’d be into exploring a relationship with Ryan too. Ryan also finds Jess insanely attractive, seeing as his sexuality is fluid, so the three of them explore each other. Everything seems to be going fine with the trio until Ben starts to feel guilty about Hailey, his daughter, and how she might react to the whole relationship. 

The huge fall out happens pretty soon after Ben starts to feel guilty and honestly…it’s devastating. I was heartbroken to read about each characters reaction to what happens. But more than anything, I felt so much sadness for Ryan. He was the third wheel in the relationship the entire time, he didn’t have anything holding him to Ben and Jess except for his immense feelings for them. Ben has a difficult time juggling the idea of his wife sleeping with another man (even though he slept with Ben without her knowing) and feeling territorial over Ryan. Jess just wants everyone to be happy. Then the timeline jumps to six months later. I couldn’t contain my tears. I felt so much during the last part of this book, I almost had to step away. Sweet, precious Ryan. I love him so much. Ugh. 

Finally Ryan gets his HEA and it honestly might be the best HEA I’ve ever read. The circumstances surrounding the happily ever after, how this trio comes together again, and the hardships they face in telling their friends and family about their new relationship, truly make this story for me. The ending was everything. A lot of the beginning and middle is sex, I won’t deny that. I mean, it’s H.O.T. Probably the best sex I’ve ever read, but it was still just sex. The ending, where there are words and actions that truly back up the claims of love…that’s the meat of this story. That’s the good stuff. I don’t think I can compliment Nyla K enough on her creativity in this story. Her eloquence and delicious verbiage totally knocked this story out of the park. Bravo. 5 stars.